While perusing Craig's list this morning (yes, I am finally considering moving out!) I noticed a section labelled "Missed Connections". I decided to explore what that really meant, and had to pass through a "Yes, I'm 18" survey... it was starting to seem suspect.

I was pleasantly surprised to find the website is sort of a wanted ad meets Lavalife profile: in the m4w (men for women) section specfically, it's where guys can write about girls they saw but didn't have the courage to go up to, or about a crush they have and can't confess. One ad in particular I really liked:

"Monday 5.30 pm Bloor subway station"

We both got on the subway at Young-bloor but you got off at saint Clair. I wish I had the chance to talk to you.Cant stop thinking about you.

I love it! It's the whole romantic (a.k.a. girly) side of me that is completely enamoured with the idea that this could possibly work; it's the whole Sleepless in Seattle syndrome. I don't know what the odds are of someone even finding this ad, let alone knowing they're the target of the fantasy... but it's nice to dream.

What are the odds!?

Lo and behold! My friend from ages ago won (or rather her mother did) the lottery! It was half the $20 M jackpot... so lucky! What I would do with 10 million dollars...

Somewhere, in a galaxy far, far away....

I was going to blog about this recent picture on the Hubble website - scientists believe it comes as a result of two gigantic clusters (of what?) smashing into each other. The most interesting part of this pic is the darker ring, which apparently is the elusive dark matter. Dark matter, in a nutshell, is mostly what the universe's mass is made up of. What's more interesting is that scientists can't actually prove its existence but can "infer" it by looking at pictures and measuring gravitational pull and blah blah. I was going to write about how fascinating it is that we know so little about the universe, and that I feel so small when I think about it, etcetera, ergo and vis-a-vis... blast, whatever.

Instead, I decided to delay the writing of my blog - nay, it was not my choice but the choice of annoying coworkers and cubemates at the office. Some would gasp at the idea of delaying writing in a personal blog (which really takes about 5 mins when I get into a rant) at work, but this nice mini-break provides me with some sanity in my work day.

However, I am now seriously annoyed at the stupid programmer jokes, and the coworkers who are trying to assert their dominance over me and the growingly complicated relationships with several of them, and therefore cannot revel in my wonder of the universe!!!!

My apologies. I think I might be PMS’ing.

Zsa zsa ewww?

As always, whenever you think it's sunshine-y outside, that you are boring and no drama can occur, it pours down on you and makes you rethink things that you think could never be shaken.

I am not necessarily saying this about me, but the past few weeks have been especially active in my social circle. It could have to do with it being spring fever, and people's foundations being shaken up by some extra hormones. Changes in career, family, love life, health, etc. has been on everyone's mind.

My recent diversion has been whether or not to activate the still-hibernating that is my love life specifically, since everything else seems to finally be stable. I'm starting to debate the importance of the zsa zsa zoo (SATC - that initial chemistry you get with a guy when it's really special). If it's really someone you can have a future with, do there need to be fireworks in the first moment you meet? Or can you be friends first and grow into a loving and chemistry-filled relationship? My friend Eva is convinced you need the amazing, initial contact in order for it to work. I am inclined to give others a chance - those guys that are great as friends, but who you don't necessarily want to jump within a minute of meeting them.

I am conflicted because I have a few friends that I have amazing chemistry with - verbally, of course. But there's a risk with trying to take it to the next level because 1) what if we're too far gone in the relationship for it to work, 2) if it was supposed to happen, wouldn't it have happened already, and 3) you can lose an amazing friend because of awkwardness.

Everyone always tells me that whatever happens, it's when you don't expect it and it's usually easy. But what if you miss that first window - can you wrench open a window later?

Way to start off the week

I couldn't find an appropriate pic to go with this post - a "frown-ey" face perhaps?

I got to work pretty early today, and went to the walk-in clinic to get make sure all was good after my cold. As I got back, my coworker asked where I was and grabbed me saying that I had to come to breakfast with them... as I came back up with my breakfast already purchased. I thought it was weird, but got the sense that something happened.

Anyway, I should preface this all by saying we have a pretty tight social group at work - until recently, it amounted to about 8-9 people. In the past 3 weeks, 3 of those people quit (right about the time we had a major re-org change announced). Today, we found out that one of the guys (my cubicle-mate) just got fired this morning. It kinda took us all by surprise, so I spent a pretty somber breakfast trying to go through the process of shock, sadness and then acceptance - that way, I would be emotionally stable before my actual boss told me.

I understand that people should separate personal from professional and that I don't know much about this guy and his work ethic, but I do know that he was a great friend to me at work. And for that I can't help but sympathize and grieve his situation - getting let go is never a good feeling, no matter how much you may expect it.

Now it's just Charlie's Angels and Bosley left...

You know what's really hot?

When you're walking to work in the morning (and by morning I mean before 8 am, when people haven't even eaten yet), and the person in front of you decides she needs a breakfast cigarette. Seriously, I really love to witness an old broad in front of me, hacking up a lung and blowing smoke in my face. It makes my day.

P.S. I just HAD to write this blog so I could put up this picture - isn't it a riot?!

Being sick sucks

Remember the days when you were a kid when you would pray to get sick?? It wouldn't happen often, but then you could stay home and watch cartoons and eat all the chicken noodle soup you wanted... ah, those were the days.

These days, getting sick is a curse - not only did I lose Sunday, 1 of the precious 2 days I have off and yesterday. Taking a sick day from work is no longer considered a vacation: I think I was more stressed about missing a deadline/meeting at work being away between my fits of coughing and naps due to drowsy medication. My teacher (a.k.a. boss) is no longer sympathetic - work has to get done, and I don't have a few days to do the make-up homework.

Other than that though, I actually got bored of the TV and watching movies - who would have thought!? It was nice to get dressed up and ready for work this morning, and to see all my colleagues - in general, rejoin the normal, social world. I guess this is what it means to be an adult... I think I just might be growing up.

Where is the line?

With some recent events in the past few days, I've realized that I am sometimes a really naive and gullible person.

I'm not refering to life in general (although I don't fare much better there), but it's the working world, and the behaviour that really has me confused.

This morning, I found myself in a pickle (I've been waiting to use that saying for quite some time now) because of a possibly inappropriate and line-crossing event that happened last night with a coworker. I don't even want to go into details, but I will just say that it was highly unexpected, and while I understand that consultants are humans too, I am seriously considering if this will have any reprecussions on my life - after all, what comes around goes around, and you can't always trust everybody right?

Because of the recent changes going on at work, I was until then an oblivious and happy-go-lucky member in my team. But since there has been some serious org changes, I've been hearing a lot of "you may like your team, but you really have to think of yourself in the end" or "the only person you can count on is yourself" and so on. To be honest, ever since this attitude reared its ugly head at work, the comraderie and quality of work has diminshed greatly - even I, the filter-free and optimist young one have been infected with the "self" vibe.

On that note, I have been seriously debating the issue of trusting people at work - I feel that I can trust friends if they give me a verbal promise not to betray my secrets, but what value does a verbal agreement have at work? If it means getting ahead, or looking good in front of the boss or, horror of all horrors, being fired, would anyone really protect their colleague? The line between friend and coworker invisible during good times, but it becomes painfully obvious when the tough gets goin.

I still intend to keep a positive attitude, but maybe yesterday was the time for my reality check. And really think about the power of my "word" - and watch what I say.

Heart attacks no longer killer?

I found this article on digg.com (after reading about all the controversy - wow, nerds get fiesty when provoked) today and found it fascinating.

It talks about what it really means to be "dead", and how it's almost the opposite of what we've been teaching our medical community until now.

From what I understand, when someone has a heart attack, it's true that their heart stops beating, but the cells actually remain alive and intact. It's only when those cells become re-oxygenated (which is usually during the time the paramedics revive the victim) that they release their self-destructive "stuff" and start to die. According to the article, a new strategy is to actually cool down the body of a heart attack victim and "bring them back to life" really slowly and avoid the release of the "suicidal chemical" the mitochondria would otherwise release. It has an 85% success rate, while the old (a.k.a. current) method had only 15% of people survive. It's amazing!

To think that we could look back in a few decades from now and realize that we could have saved so many people and we had the strategy all wrong. Kind of like how a few centuries ago, people would bury the "dead" who were really just in comas and would actually wake back up while buried. ("Saved by the bell" apparently stems from that, when during the Plague people were being buried alive but unconscious, and morticians started tying bells to their hands before being buried so that they could save them if they woke up. Can we say creepy?!)

I wonder how this topic came about....

"Hey, you know what we should study?"
"What?"
"So I've been observing lesbian women and I've noticed that they all look bigger than the heterosexual women. I think we should get someone to fund us for a 5 year study and find out if that's true or not. This could have serious reprecussions on society-at-large, plus we could give lesbians even more reason to feel bad about themselves."
"That sounds like a great idea."

An Unfortunate Doppleganger

Every time I come to Markham, I always find some kind of interesting article or event in the world (due to the inability to escape outta here and due to the fact that I know no one). For instance, did you know that yesterday was International Dance Day? I have yet to specify if that means a day celebrating different national dances, or simply a day where it is encouraged to “boogie”. In the case that it’s the latter, I must admit that every day is “International Dance Day” for me (I’m a notorious car dancer).

More on that later… a more interesting blurb blurb came my way today about Bin Laden being arrested. I could not believe that this did not make news headlines all over the world! Unfortunately, what it’s really about is a poor Afghani chap trying to cross the border into Pakistan who happens to look exactly like OBL. Not only did he go through this traumatic experience recently, but it’s not the first time - he’s been arrested before! What’s that saying: “Fool me once, shame on you - fool me twice, shame on me”? These officials should get their facts straight, cause not only are they embarrassing themselves, but OBL might get clever and use him as a decoy.

I am truly fascinated by the idea of a doppelganger. I feel like it’s comforting and exciting to know that there is someone out there who looks exactly like me. Although some people describe doppelganger as an “evil twin”, I prefer not to think of it that way. In fact, apparently if you ever find this person, you are both supposed to be destroyed and/or ruined. Kinda like Harry Potter and Voldemort. I was hoping to meet mine eventually, given the whole “one must die while the other lives” kinda sucks.

P.S. I had to add this article - sometimes people are truly idiots. A bizarre twist here would be if the new groom/groom’s brother was also his doppelganger.

It’s been an interesting week…

In a nutshell, I spent the entire weekend outside - a combination of washing the car, tanning outside, coffee and club patios. I have to say, I now know what has been missing in the past 6 months - the freedom of going outside, wearing next to nothing and just enjoying the city as it should be enjoyed. Speaking of which, gotta hit the gym… no one should be wearing Daisy Duke shorts looking like Rita McNeil…

I also got a chance to see PCD and Christina Aguilera on Monday night. One word: amazing. Hot. Incredible. Ok, many words.

Anyway, during the weekend festivities my girlfriend Eva and I stopped by a vegan restaurant called Fressen. It is a very earthy and hip place on Queen St W, and even though the list of ingredients seems to be limited to veggies and fruit, it was surprisingly good! I would love to be vegan, but my love of fish and eggs would probably not be acceptable (just maybe). But it inspired me to try out new things, and also explore different parts of Toronto (who knew we had so many great restaurants and patios?)

Here comes an amazing summer in TO!

Akon at Zen Nightclub, Trinidad - Disgusting

I think the title of this video says it all - I am seriously disgusted and shocked that something like this happened - and "artists" like this are actually popular. Notice the audience clapping!

Today is a sad day for rappers - Cam'ron is quoted in the news today as saying "he wouldn't helpt police catch even a serial killer because it would hurt his business"... all I have to say is - what the deuce is going on!?

Pearl the Landlord

I just watched this video and nearly choked on my DC - this is the funniest video (albeit a little scary if she remembers the words they taught her).

I gotta go - need to "get my drink on"...

Ever since graduation/my trip to Europe, I've been building a "List of things to do before I'm 25... then 30" so that I can be conscious of everything I still want to accomplish.

I checked off one additional item on that list this weekend - auditioning for Canadian Idol. It was a really fast, and only slightly nerve-wracking experience - I think I'm actually getting better at this whole "performing in front of strangers" thing. I got some really nice compliments, but apparently "have what a lot of other people have" - I think they need something different and original this year. I went in just for the experience, but I got so motivated after it that I'm definitely trying out next year again! This is why I love the list - a personal dare turned into a self-affirming experience - and I can't wait to challenge myself with the next item on that list.

Friggatriskaidekaphobia

I don’t really consider myself a superstitious person, but I have to admit that every time a “Friday the 13th” comes along I think twice about doing anything significant (because of the tiny possibility that luck may not be in my favour that day). How silly, you all say… however, a quick Google search produced hundreds of thousands of hits about the superstition: stats about increased accidents, unexplained bad luck and fear so paralyzing that 5% of the US population has physically harmful anxiety on this day.

It’s funny that no one can really explain where the superstition comes from - Dan Brown insinuated that it was the day that King Philip ordered the arrests and murders of the Templars sometime ago, and that day has been considered unlucky since then. Either way, it is one of those globally-spanning superstitions, and Wikipedia lists it as especially significant in Germany, Poland, Portugal and English-speaking countries… Poland? Really? I think all we need is a nice drink to get rid our worries…I wasn’t even going to go out tonight but now I see that it’s physically necessary.

P.S. Is the reason apartment buildings don’t have a 13th floor because of bad luck? Riiiiight…

Would you bail me out of jail?

I recently had a conversation with my coworkers about Facebook, and mentioned that I had over 400 friends listed on my network. Although a lot of these people are those that I don’t even talk to, but significant from my past, my coworkers couldn’t believe that I would bother being “FB Friends” with so many…

…from which stemmed a lovely conversation about what a “real” friend is, and how many you really have that you can call more than an acquaintance. The Facebook Coolness Factor seems to be to have as many friends as possible, when really you could only stand to see 4-5 of them on a daily basis. My coworkers say that in fact, they can think of 1 or 2 that they would really count on. “What does ‘really counting on them’ mean?” I ask.

To which Kevin replied, “My best friend is a guy who I know would lend me a significant sum of money, no questions asked, if I asked him to lend it to me. Or he’d be the guy that I would use my one, single phone call from jail from cause I know he’d drop everything and come bail me out.”

That got me thinking… sure enough, although I have all these FBFs, I can only count on one hand the number of people that would do that for me. This has become my measuring stick in the past couple of weeks, so much so that I have started to care for those suckers that would do that for me more than those I realized wouldn’t. These are the girls/guys that will most probably get me outta that inevitably bad relationship, or tell me I have something in my teeth… both incredibly necessary and difficult to do.

Point being, I hope that everyone realizes who those friends are (and hopefully you haven’t been a jerk your whole life and can name someone other than your parents) and treat them like gold - I know I am.

We have a new enemy on a very new front

My friend Bart sent me this great article today - kinda random but definitely a compliment to us Polish girls.

Eva, Adam and I were talking about relationships (what else) this weekend, and traveling to Poland, and how almost every woman you see there looks like she just stepped off of a runway, while the Polish guys look like they’re all gang members (and act like it too). And yet, by default, these bum guys get these gorgeous girls…

Anyway, moving past that, the background behind this online piece is that a lot of Polish people (mostly young adults or young families) are emigrating to the West - Ireland, England - since we entered the EU. It’s actually kinda sad for Poland, because we can’t seem to keep our young peeps in the motherland.

Anyway, these British Pirate-Hookers™ [courtesy of A.B.] are deciding that the Polish girls are too hot for their own good and bullying/beating them up! It seems the British males are more inclined to the Eastern European ways, and the locals aren’t appreciating it. Shameful… I feel like they’re animals trying to mark their territory.

On that note, I am heading to the U.K. this June (officially got some vacation approved today!) so needless to say I’ll be kicking some British ass when I get there…

Lent update

With Palm Sunday approaching and Lent almost being over, I have to say I think I have followed through pretty well with my Lenten promise.

I thought giving something up was overdone (especially "junk food" or "TV") since most people can't follow through with that anyway, or end up spending the time/money that they may save on equally wasteful activities. To be blunt, my goal throughout these 40 days was to "avoid being a bitch". It's been hard but I've made a conscious after.

I have to say though, after reading this article on CNN , being nicer is nothing compared to what these people chose to give up! I mean, it's damn near impossible...

I’ve become a true Toronto downtown-ite

Ever since I started work, I wanted to make sure I still maintain some individuality throughout this rat race that we call the “working world”. This may seem silly, but part of that commitment was to keep bringing my own lunch, take the TTC like a trooper (regardless of the crazies) and by all means, avoid coffee like the plague. I can say right away that bringing my own lunch stopped at about week #2.

Unfortunately, this week has become another week of broken promises - not only did I take the GO Train for the first time yesterday, but I loved it! It’s the most comfortable, quiet and fast ride to work - and it’s even better than I thought it could be. I have to admit, embracing the crazies on the subway has neither been as rewarding nor as mutual as I thought it would be. I tried to be nice to one, and got lava-burned on my first attempt [I’m not going into detail]. Yesterday morning on my way through the tunnels of Kipling station, my bitterness for the TTC was coupled with a good-looking man almost beckoning me to follow him to the GO Train station. I followed my gut (and libido) and lo and behold, found myself on the GO - and felt a real guilty pleasure.


My other broken promise is almost too horrible to speak of: as a constant nag to my coworkers and family, I have been a vocal opponent to this unhealthy addiction. But a simple mistake made me a hypocrite this week. Last week, I (innocently) went to Second Cup and wasn’t sure what to get, when the coffee man (of course, a good-looking one again) suggested a Moccacino with soy milk and half the chocolate. I naively accepted, and then tasted the most delicious drink I’ve ever had. Since then, every day I pass by the Second Cup (on the way to work) I have to fight off the urge the evil but delicious coffee…

I can now concede that 1) coffee is a true and real addiction, 2) “subway crazies” are no longer an amusement but a provocation and 3) my libido/men in suits/men in Second Cup uniforms get me into trouble.