The week in review

Many times this week I sat down to write a post, but they all ended up unfinished drafts in my blog. So here's a quick summary of events from the past 6 days:

RI.P. Moe
I came home from a very filling dinner with Jess and Adam at Milestone's, and found that my pet fish was not swimming in his recently cleaned "aquarium" (read: vase) in my room. Apparently I had been too nice and filled his home with water that neared too close to the brim, and he decided to try out his suicidal flip and landed on the floor beside my bookcase. It ended a 14 month love affair, and it was sad because he saw me through my first 14 months of work. Perhaps a sign that a career change is needed? Hmmm

Other than that, working on an art project that I will display once it's completed, getting drunk at home off of wine with the parents on a weekday, trying to spice up my work social life by organizing a team lunch. All that with the city's first snowfall on Wednesday which was lovely, but apparently caused havoc in the city since you know, we've never seen snow before.

Today was a day spent window shopping and my grandma's, which was an odd visit. I love my grandma to pieces, but she's not always the most rational or logical person. Today's visit we talked about her visit to the oncologist who gae more detail about her recent cancer appearance, this time in the bones. He prescribed 5 shots of radiation, over 5 consecutive days. To which I said was a great option, because she could get it over with within a measly week, and then minimize the tumours that are in her back ribs. She responded telling Adam and I that she is not going for any treatment, including this radiation. Apparently this treatment requires the maximum radiation strength, and would mess her body up to an unrecoverable point. She said she wanted to enjoy her life the way she is now, with minimal pain and with no radiation after effects. I tried to argue the treatment solution, but I found I actually couldn't come up with a rational reason why she should do it - even though she *may* extend her life with it, the quality would be decreased. And she IS the owner of her body, and all we can do is be supportive and respect her difficult decision.

So on that note, we are celebrating Jen and Jake's birthday tonight, and cheers! to a good time.

It's Christmastime, it's Christmastime

The older I become, the sooner Christmastime starts - this year, a Christmas carol was first played on November 1. And the warm and fuzzy feelings started... I can't tell whether the warm and fuzzy feelings are around because I'm already more feeling-y than usual, but whatever it is, anytime I see a red Starbucks cup or a Christmas tree I get a little giddy.

I don't really care about the fact that "Christmas is commercialized" or that it's now an agnostic holiday, because as long as people still get that warm and fuzzy feeling, it's ok (as long as it's not because they're anticipating all the gifts they're going to get). Every year for 12 years of my childhood I would be spending this time putting on Christmas concerts, teaching and taking young kids to carol in public, and all around just preparing for the end of the year.

This year I have the added bonus of taking a little trip before Christmas, so I am a bagillion times more excited and thumpering with anticipation.

I just hope it snows!

Current mood - pensive

My new favourite part of the day is my evening shower. And not because of dirty reasons, but for clean ones (both literally and psychologically haha).

I really felt the power of a nice, hot shower last night, when I was in a crappy mood after a long day - I came home and had a long webcam session, which was the first step to feeling better, and then jumped in the shower to get ready for bed. There is something so therapeutic about them, where you feel like you're really washing away your bad day and you can come out a renewed person.

After a heart-wrenching night with E last night, a shower this morning was in high demand. Short sleep time, alcohol and emotional talks can take a lot out of a girl... it always amazes me how much we can be affected by matters of the heart. We are rational creatues, but when we get our feelings hurt (or pummeled or stamped on, etc.), we cannot rationalize everything except for the fact that we hurt. And it's not an open scar to see, and can sometimes never heal. How horrible.

Anyway... my friends, as always, are stronger than I could ever have imagined, and she is already doing so well and seeing her time with him through new eyes, which is all you can hope for. We came to realize that the best thing to do is invest in yourself continuously, because it's an investment that never fails.

Summary - invest in yourself by taking long, hot showers, but with men who deserve them.

Multi-tasking 1.01

Well, I thought I was already a pretty good multitasker but again, I have been humbled. Today is my first day trying to manage 2 different phone numbers, 4 different email accounts and 2 internet connections that give me access to different allowable sites. On top of that I can access internet off of my computer AND my iTouch, so I am constantly forgetting where I check what and when.

All of this is for a the very good reason of keeping in touch with both my personal and professional life, which also mostly means figuring out a way to keep in touch with 'the bf'. It's only been 4 days, so the adjustment period is obviously fresh, and the funny thing is I don't mind any of the admin or extra time/effort that it takes to keep in touch. In fact I didn't even notice it until I just described it right now. It really is amazing what the right motivation will do to your perspective, and how a person really can change their behaviour when the right reason comes along.

And although I'm whining about the fact that I have so many machines to keep track of, I am so so happy that I am born in this technological revolution that allows me to upkeep a long distance relationship relatively painlessly (considering the alternative of handwritten letters). Phones to call and text, email, chatting, webcam... these are all nice subs until I get to see my guy again.

And I am thankful as I appreciate the wonders of multitasking.

The end of an era... and October

I cannot believe how quickly time is passing - it feels like summer and Europe were not that long ago, and yet it's been over 5 months since I left for London and summer is def over - this morning I woke up to freezing temperatures and frost on my car window - sucky!

Anyway, today is the first day that I am without my boo, W and I miss him a LOT. It's been an amazing 2+ months... maybe that's the reason why time passed so quickly. I had officially become one of those sappy couple-types that people hate seeing in public, and the funny thing? I don't mind! Although the amount of sappy songs on the radio is ridiculous - trying to hold it together is harder when EVERY station is playing some "I miss you" and "why can't we be together" crap.

Like my friend Ashley said last night, the first night is the worst and then it gets better. I am just worried (as silly as this may sound) when I actually do get over the sadness of it all, that I will start to forget things. Which is a double-edged sword - I want to not be sad, but I also do. Missing someone means there are real and strong feelings there, so the absence of missing someone would imply absence of feelings? I don't know.

Whatever it is, I'm just taking it one day at a time. And listening to hardcore rap - it really soothes the mind.