Smarties - do you eat the red ones last?

I have some Halloween candy left over, which consists of mini Smarties boxes which are really the perfect size. I like to dump out the whole box, and put matching pairs of Smarties in one pile, and the ones with no matching colour in another. I like to eat the single colour ones one at a time, which is first suck on them until they break down the middle and eat the cholocate, and then the shells. Once I'm done that pile, I like the eat the pairs the "normal" way, with one on each side of my mouth.

Weird? Yes. OCD? Perhaps. But it makes me feel sooooo good.

The true meaning of "sick day"

So I am not feeling the greatest today - a weekend of poor food choices, not enough sleep and what I think is a cold have allowed me to call in sick today. But calling in sick is not what I thought it would be - I actually am calling in on phone conferences, doing work on a deadline and whilst in bed, surrounded by papers and my ever trusty IBM laptop. These kind of sick days suck. Might as well call it a suck day (I just came up with that, can you tell?)

Women drive me crazy!!

My guy support is either moving to cubicles away from me or being taken off my project... not only that but these women are driving me crazy with their moods and bitchiness. I go on this rant every so often.

Chicks are driving me crazy!!!

Well duh!

"Bad kissers don't get to second base"

As if this is some crazy scientific find. Relationships are based on attraction, so if the first physical step isn't great, of course the next one wouldn't be either.

I also found an article talking about a guy whose sore was being robbed was shot at, and put his hand up to defend himself from the bullet and it deflected off his wedding ring. Lucky bastard. Lucky wife?

The week in review

Many times this week I sat down to write a post, but they all ended up unfinished drafts in my blog. So here's a quick summary of events from the past 6 days:

RI.P. Moe
I came home from a very filling dinner with Jess and Adam at Milestone's, and found that my pet fish was not swimming in his recently cleaned "aquarium" (read: vase) in my room. Apparently I had been too nice and filled his home with water that neared too close to the brim, and he decided to try out his suicidal flip and landed on the floor beside my bookcase. It ended a 14 month love affair, and it was sad because he saw me through my first 14 months of work. Perhaps a sign that a career change is needed? Hmmm

Other than that, working on an art project that I will display once it's completed, getting drunk at home off of wine with the parents on a weekday, trying to spice up my work social life by organizing a team lunch. All that with the city's first snowfall on Wednesday which was lovely, but apparently caused havoc in the city since you know, we've never seen snow before.

Today was a day spent window shopping and my grandma's, which was an odd visit. I love my grandma to pieces, but she's not always the most rational or logical person. Today's visit we talked about her visit to the oncologist who gae more detail about her recent cancer appearance, this time in the bones. He prescribed 5 shots of radiation, over 5 consecutive days. To which I said was a great option, because she could get it over with within a measly week, and then minimize the tumours that are in her back ribs. She responded telling Adam and I that she is not going for any treatment, including this radiation. Apparently this treatment requires the maximum radiation strength, and would mess her body up to an unrecoverable point. She said she wanted to enjoy her life the way she is now, with minimal pain and with no radiation after effects. I tried to argue the treatment solution, but I found I actually couldn't come up with a rational reason why she should do it - even though she *may* extend her life with it, the quality would be decreased. And she IS the owner of her body, and all we can do is be supportive and respect her difficult decision.

So on that note, we are celebrating Jen and Jake's birthday tonight, and cheers! to a good time.

It's Christmastime, it's Christmastime

The older I become, the sooner Christmastime starts - this year, a Christmas carol was first played on November 1. And the warm and fuzzy feelings started... I can't tell whether the warm and fuzzy feelings are around because I'm already more feeling-y than usual, but whatever it is, anytime I see a red Starbucks cup or a Christmas tree I get a little giddy.

I don't really care about the fact that "Christmas is commercialized" or that it's now an agnostic holiday, because as long as people still get that warm and fuzzy feeling, it's ok (as long as it's not because they're anticipating all the gifts they're going to get). Every year for 12 years of my childhood I would be spending this time putting on Christmas concerts, teaching and taking young kids to carol in public, and all around just preparing for the end of the year.

This year I have the added bonus of taking a little trip before Christmas, so I am a bagillion times more excited and thumpering with anticipation.

I just hope it snows!

Current mood - pensive

My new favourite part of the day is my evening shower. And not because of dirty reasons, but for clean ones (both literally and psychologically haha).

I really felt the power of a nice, hot shower last night, when I was in a crappy mood after a long day - I came home and had a long webcam session, which was the first step to feeling better, and then jumped in the shower to get ready for bed. There is something so therapeutic about them, where you feel like you're really washing away your bad day and you can come out a renewed person.

After a heart-wrenching night with E last night, a shower this morning was in high demand. Short sleep time, alcohol and emotional talks can take a lot out of a girl... it always amazes me how much we can be affected by matters of the heart. We are rational creatues, but when we get our feelings hurt (or pummeled or stamped on, etc.), we cannot rationalize everything except for the fact that we hurt. And it's not an open scar to see, and can sometimes never heal. How horrible.

Anyway... my friends, as always, are stronger than I could ever have imagined, and she is already doing so well and seeing her time with him through new eyes, which is all you can hope for. We came to realize that the best thing to do is invest in yourself continuously, because it's an investment that never fails.

Summary - invest in yourself by taking long, hot showers, but with men who deserve them.

Multi-tasking 1.01

Well, I thought I was already a pretty good multitasker but again, I have been humbled. Today is my first day trying to manage 2 different phone numbers, 4 different email accounts and 2 internet connections that give me access to different allowable sites. On top of that I can access internet off of my computer AND my iTouch, so I am constantly forgetting where I check what and when.

All of this is for a the very good reason of keeping in touch with both my personal and professional life, which also mostly means figuring out a way to keep in touch with 'the bf'. It's only been 4 days, so the adjustment period is obviously fresh, and the funny thing is I don't mind any of the admin or extra time/effort that it takes to keep in touch. In fact I didn't even notice it until I just described it right now. It really is amazing what the right motivation will do to your perspective, and how a person really can change their behaviour when the right reason comes along.

And although I'm whining about the fact that I have so many machines to keep track of, I am so so happy that I am born in this technological revolution that allows me to upkeep a long distance relationship relatively painlessly (considering the alternative of handwritten letters). Phones to call and text, email, chatting, webcam... these are all nice subs until I get to see my guy again.

And I am thankful as I appreciate the wonders of multitasking.

The end of an era... and October

I cannot believe how quickly time is passing - it feels like summer and Europe were not that long ago, and yet it's been over 5 months since I left for London and summer is def over - this morning I woke up to freezing temperatures and frost on my car window - sucky!

Anyway, today is the first day that I am without my boo, W and I miss him a LOT. It's been an amazing 2+ months... maybe that's the reason why time passed so quickly. I had officially become one of those sappy couple-types that people hate seeing in public, and the funny thing? I don't mind! Although the amount of sappy songs on the radio is ridiculous - trying to hold it together is harder when EVERY station is playing some "I miss you" and "why can't we be together" crap.

Like my friend Ashley said last night, the first night is the worst and then it gets better. I am just worried (as silly as this may sound) when I actually do get over the sadness of it all, that I will start to forget things. Which is a double-edged sword - I want to not be sad, but I also do. Missing someone means there are real and strong feelings there, so the absence of missing someone would imply absence of feelings? I don't know.

Whatever it is, I'm just taking it one day at a time. And listening to hardcore rap - it really soothes the mind.

Monkeying around can actually kill you

Whilst reading my Monday morning news online, I came across an article which headlined as "man attacked by monkeys". At first I thought it was a joke, but when I opened it up, it described how a senior official (deputy mayor in New Delhi) was attacked by a gang of Rhesus Macacques and during the scuffle, fell out of his balcony and died.

Damn.

Word of the day

Poots.

It's a great word... I used it at least 5 times since I got home today, mostly in the context of "I'm pootsed out".

..mostly used as an adjective, it's synonymous to 'tired' but on a greater scale. Adam likes to use it as "that's poots", so that he has more to say than just "shiiiit" to all my stories.

Great word - it'll be the next big thing.

On that note, work tomorrow at 6am after a great long weekend in Niagara - that's pooooots.

So I met this guy...

So having become recently "non-single" - wow that's a wordy way of saying I now have a boyfriend - I am being faced with lots of "relationshippy things". These range from the joy of having someone in your life that is a man and that you can really be your complete self with, but also to all those annoying issues like "trust" and "commitment" and "feelings"... etc.

I admit, I really like being single when I am single, and I could never give that up to someone I am not crazy about. But when it's someone who is a good match, there's no question of giving up my bachelorette status - it's worth it.

I did, however, forget that inevitable rollercoaster that happens in the beginning that everyone conveniently forgets about. Of course it's a great time, with lots of getting to know each other and crazy chemistry - but on the flip side, you have to build trust and be secure in knowing this person will still like you when they DO see your crazy side. And getting to know someone's buttons is fun, but also disconcerting if you press the wrong one and the machine shuts off.

Point being, I think I've realized that being single is easier - which doesn't make it right or wrong, but if you're not ready to put in the work (and it could be fun work!) you are a sucky partner. And although being in a relationship requires commitment (gasp) and compromising (crap) it's so rewarding at the end of the day.

Allllll of this to say, in obviously the most romantic way possible, is that I am no longer single, and I am super happy about it :)

Too much estrogen...

I swear, today I've reached my peak - I've had it with chicks. Too much attitude, too many moods and inconsistency across the board. I hate to insult my sex but hanging out with mostly boys the past few weeks has really highlighted the fact that hanging out with girls is so much more stressful. Too much "self-editing" and talking about feelings can really get exhausting.

P.S. This rant does not include any of my friends, since I have seriously cool girlfriends. Well, most of them.

What a weekend

Song(s) of the weekend: select songs from the Rihanna album (after seeing her concert): Please don't stop the music, I hate that I love you and Rehab, and Roy Orbison's Pretty Woman and Crying.

Quite an assortment I know, but I needed some new music for my new ride. Spent about 4 hours in the car on Saturday driving to, around and from London and then today driving to the Docks and around downtown. I've already put 550 km on the car and it's been 3 days - so great.

Altogether it's been a weekend of driving and talking. A lot. I caught up with a bunch of people in London, and then drove most of the day while dancing in my car and realizing that there is a whole new world of speeding in a hatchback when compared to the van.

Today I purged and felt relief through cleaning, which my friend JB told me only "a chick could feel better doing". It was an emotional morning, full of the loveliness that relationships bring, which basically means more talking, and then watching Eva windsurf on Lake Ontario interspersed with more talking. I don't think Adam has ever had to listen to more chicks talk, especially with his friend going through boy troubles of her own and asking for advice through text. But when we did take breaks, don't they look cute:

Overall a good weekend, but I'm in bed at 930 for a reason - exhausting, in a word. I need a break from my weekend, which sucks since tomorrow is Monday morning, arguable the worst time of the week.

Soundtrack for tomorrow? Cry me a river.

New car!

Picking up my new car today! Although it technically isn't mine, since all I'm actually leasing it, in which case it still belongs to Honda which is really fine by me. My workmates congratulated me on my “new relationship”, and I told them I am happy about it but I just wish it were free.

I took the day off yesterday because I was sick, and it was a fabulous, glorious day - I relaxed and cooked and cleaned and felt very much renewed. I liked playing the role of housewife for the day (although I don't think I could do it permanently). I came into work today hoping that sense of renewal would stay, but it's been fading slowly since I passed through the automatic entry door...

On that note, as happy as I am recently, I'm also feeling unsettled in an... unsettling way (for lack of a better word). For someone who's not a type A person, I am craving some planning or talking or debriefing time. I feel like at any point something might blow up in my face, which is a crappy feeling. I don't like the unknown unless you're anticipating a good kind of surprise.

I'm not usually in the habit of reading horoscopes, but this one popped up for me today...

There could be some friction at work; but if you can be sensitive to other people's feelings, you should get by. You might want to take inventory and throw out things that are no longer important to you. If you are getting an itch to plan a vacation, you may want to consider a place with a mountain view or somewhere with a beach.

Sound advice, astrology peeps.

So you had a bad day..

...except that mine isn't over just yet - talk about a sucky day!

So it's already a Monday which doesn't put anybody in a good mood... I wake up after a busy weekend exhausted and feverish, and make my way to work. Boring work. Then I get called in for a meeting where I am told a partner of mine in an important fundraising campaign is pulling out 3 weeks before the start. Bad news. Then I annoy my boss because I forgot to send in some useless HR information sheet. Yadda yadda. And finally I am being shunned for getting other people sick. Blah blah.

Horoscope for the day:

Your contacts at work have probably been putting in a good word for you. As a result, there may be a chance for a promotion or an assignment with more responsibility. You might have an awkward moment with a family member but be
willing to talk things over and diffuse the situation. Be sure to set aside time for your love partner.

How ironic, because we can agree the first statement is inaccurate, the second is wishful thinking, three is most likely and the last is highly erroneous given circumstances and attitudes.

I shall now go and wallow in my own w(h)ine... I feel much better now.

Puts a new spin on "hump" day

Two days ago the headlines were "Putin dissolves the Russian government", and now Russia just celebrated a day off given specifically to couples for some lovin at home. I swear, I am torn in between disgust at the disregard for democracy, but also adoring the fact that Russians are encouraging some love-making among their people.

Of course the reason actually has some merit (or does it??) - the Russian population is shrinking and they are in need of some new babies being born. Yesterday was 9 months away from Russia's birthday, and the government has decided anyone who has a baby on that day will be rewarded with cars, TVs etc. Talk about incentive! I move we bring this tradition to Canada - isn't our population shrinking too?


On another note, toooo cuuuute - Basically, the baby macaque was abandoned and almost died, but was nursed back with the help of meds and a friendship with this pigeon - apparently it has a new "lease on life". Pictures and stories like this just get to me... I almost can't handle it. What a girl!

The end of a summer

So this past week was my last week in Montreal - went very well, we finished a day and half ahead of time and I got the Friday off... the only dark spot in an otherwise amazing week was when one of my coworkers, an older gentleman decided to open up at our last lunch and tell Fred and I about his threesomes and "f friends" in great detail...*shudder*

Anyway, I had some visitors - Amal came from Halifax on Thursday and we partied til Sunday, met up with Dan and his friends (pictured above) on Friday evening, met up with Wassim and his friends on Saturday night - basically rocked the whole weekend. Turns out our friends Brian, Phil and Will (all separate groups) were in town too, so it was an awesome weekend.

I was gone in Montreal until Monday night, and it felt like I went on a second vacation, especially since I was seeing Dan (who I met in Croatia just in June) - it was really hard to come back and face the reality of starting a new, long-term project in Toronto and getting used to everything at home again! On top of which the summer is over.

I will definitely be visiting Montreal again. Soon.

Notable anniversary...

Today, on August 29th, I am celebrating the first day in my second year of work (I started working on August 28th a year ago). Holy crap, time flies by!

That is all.

Man! I feel like a... pirate

So if I ever felt like being a feminist, it was after reading this article - how awesome!
A forward thinker is an understatement... not only a woman in a man-only role, but piracy and violence and power, oh my!

Maybe THAT'S why they made Johnny Depp look so fruity in his movies....